I am........

     I have spent the last 14 months trying to figure out who I am. Grieving and angry over what I've lost. I have seen the dark recesses of hell and fought my way through. I have had thoughts and made plans because the emotional pain and loss was too great to bear. I also fought my way through that. So who is Roberta today?

    I am a mother who misses her sons terribly everyday, but only wish them to be happy.
    I am a wife that loves my husband for 1000 reasons, but mostly because he stayed, no matter how difficult, and he loves me more today than ever before.
    I am a grandmother who's heart literally leaps in it's chest when I hold my grandchildren.
    I am a friend that has made mistakes, and caused hurt, but to those that stood by me, I love you and will remain loyal and grateful for the rest of my life. I will keep your secrets, hold you when you cry, protect you with my life and make you laugh when you need it most.
    I am a girl that loves pink, and purple and flowers and butterflies, beautifully hand-made items, as well as a baseball fan that yells and swears during Tigers games, takes it personally when they lose, can quote stats, and believes there is no better way to spend a Saturday than watching a game.
    I am a girl that crochets lovely things and loves to design and embellish, only to see the smile on someone's face when they see it. 
    I also am a girl that turns into a crazy, cussing, screaming, maniac from mid-August to the first week of February during football season. I love everything about the game. I love playing Fantasy Football, and I hate losing!
     I am a girl that loves God. I know that he has walked this walk with me, and it by his hand I am here today. But I am also a girl that accepts and respects all beliefs and religions.
     I am often  sad, scared, and anxious, and it's ok. I have excepted the events of the past 14 months, and am ready to move on, the events will always be in my heart, but not controlling my life.
     I am a girl that needs help to control her demons, and I have found it. I believe everyone has their own demons and choose to never judge someone again, as I have felt judged and unloved, and it is painful.
     I am a girl that still has bad days, and that's ok, too. The next day they are over, forgotten, and I move on.
     I believe a smile or a friendly word can make someone's day and always choose to say thank you, or have a nice day.
     I am a cancer survivor. While fighting the cancer was the easiest part of my journey, I am thankful for the disease, as it has saved my life. The diagnosis sent me on a journey of self-discovery and brought me to a place where I am happy with me. I am not perfect by world's standards. I am flawed, and my flaws are beautiful and they are mine.

I am me, and she is exactly who I want to be. You should take some time to get to know me (again), you may be pleasantly surprised!